Your body is like a Ferrari!

My body’s nobody’s body but my own!

I remember this from when I was a kid and learning about our bodies and what was a “good touch” and what was a “bad touch”.

As we grow we often forget to honour what is good and bad for our bodies. We take our body for granted and treat it poorly.

What if you looked at your body like an expensive car: you have bought it brand new, it’s shiny, runs like a dream and you love to show it off to your friends at the car shows (insert cat call here).

Now what if I told you, that car was going to eventually get old and no longer work and that the manufacturer that makes the parts has long since gone out of business! Wouldn’t you do everything you could to maintain your car’s well being!

I can’t imagine that you would drive like a maniac, let it stay covered in mud, drive with flat tires, put anything other than premium fuel in the tank or let anyone else drive it recklessly!!

So why do we treat our own bodies like that?

Your body is the ONLY one you’ve got! Sure you can replace certain parts, but like a fine car when you get body work done after an accident, it’s never quite the same as it was with its original parts.

So it’s time to start treating your body as it’s meant to be treated...like a well engineered, expensive, beautiful car!
Be gentle with your car, enjoy driving it, but stay safe, don’t let anyone else treat your car poorly!

Begin by...
Giving it a good wash: get rid of any gross mud you are carrying around: habits, past hurts, negative beliefs

Then...
Fill it up with Premium fuel: stop feeding your car diesel if it takes petroleum--eat healthy, drink loads of water, take vitamins

Finally...
Take it out for a drive: your engine needs to run to stay in good working order: exercise, laugh,
dance, walk, jog, play, get outside

You will not only maintain your car for a lot longer, but you will also find more joy in using that car! After all, there’s nothing like a Sunday drive in a beautiful car to feel like a million bucks!

Vroom, vroom...ENJOY!

A little love story

Some of you may wonder how a wife lets her husband do the job that Rodney does. Part of the reason is his character. Part of it is my implicit trust in him and his love.

Wanna hear our love story?!

We both attended the same Bible school in Saskatchewan where we're from. Over the three years, we became good friends. But we dated other people. I actually ended up engaged to someone else and moved to Winnipeg to go to college and be close to him. Rod headed the other direction to Vancouver Island to work with youth.

My relationship was rocky to say the least. I was in it for the wrong reasons (I could write a book on it someday...and hope to!) But I was a nice girl and it took a long time before I broke it off.

Shortly after, we saw each other at a mutual friends' wedding. Instant attraction...but I was there with the other guy. Needless to say, Rod was a little confused, but we worked it out by mail. A month later, he was asking me to visit him on the island (he paid for my ticket with money that he was going to use to buy his first good camera...awww!)

Let me tell you, if you are concerned about not falling in love soon after another relationship, don't go to Vancouver Island! I was a goner. Being with Rod was a complete contrast from the other guy. I felt so accepted, so comfortable, so loved...just the way I was. And he showered me with affection...lots of hugs.

Well, we went on two dates after that: a friend's wedding, and Christmas, and then we got engaged. In Winnipeg, on February 13th. Tons of letters, cards, and phone calls (I was the envy of every girl in college!) fleshed out our courtship. We got married June 15th. And now we're coming up on fifteen years together.

We've had a very interesting journey. Lots of moves and job changes. Winnipeg has become home over the last 11 years though. Through it all, we've been best friends.

What is the secret of our success? Well, there are three things we have tried to make a habit of:

1. Going to bed at the same time - ensures that we don't "miss each other" on a busy day and we feel more connected at that important close of the day
2. Sleeping naked - skin-to-skin contact isn't just for promoting attachment between babies and moms...it is a glorious way of feeling close and transparent (and comfortable) and when you have kids, you need all the help you can get to stay intimate
3. Praying together before bed - these days one of us inevitably falls asleep while the other is praying (it's so soothing!), but what a great way to take your concerns and problems to Someone higher, to hear your spouse's heart, and to ask for help in keeping your marriage strong

And for those of you who are still looking for "the one", or are in a serious relationship, I think a vital ingredient for any long-lasting relationship is absolute acceptance of each other. If you are going into a relationship thinking that you can change or help the other, you're in trouble. If you feel you can't be yourself or are being controlled, you are in trouble. To make a marriage work, you need to see the other as a gift. Through all the ups and downs.

Passion may ebb and flow. Some seasons will be more difficult than others. But when we make the other a priority, when we commit ourselves to the highest good of the other, beautiful things can happen. Even miracles. Someone said something like this (sorry I can't remember the source exactly right now), "Commitment doesn't flow out of passion. Passion flows out of commitment."

Happy Valentine's Day! Thanks for listening to our love story!

Marvelously Made

Two days in a row I've heard excellent speakers refer to our "caveman days". And while I appreciate the way they were bringing out the unique characteristics of men and women in the process, I just can't buy into the story of how those characteristics originated.

I believe there are deeper, richer reasons for the way we are (as men and women) than simply the best means of surviving and passing on our DNA. Essentially, I believe we were designed this way.

In the world around us, when we see incredible art or engineering, we immediately recognize a creator is behind the creation. Well, we are amazing. We are art. We are intricately engineered. Even if we only look at all the physical parts of our bodies--or even one part--we can't help but wonder how it came to be. But when we add in our capacity to think and feel and create, and on top of that, how our thoughts and emotions affect our bodies and vice versa, it is almost too much to process.

So, what do you think? Is it just lucky we are the way we are? Are you content to believe the reason we have our unique qualities is simply that they are the ones that survived? Or do you long for a greater purpose and design to be behind your beautiful existence?

A great king once wrote a song about this, and we are privileged to be able to read the expression of his heart thousands of years later in our own language:

"You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother's womb.
Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous--how well I know it."
~ Psalm 139:13-14

Enjoy rest and reflection today and have a great week!

My Body: What’s Love got to do with it?

My sister made a comment last week that blew me away: “I used to live from the neck up.” Her words captured perfectly how I lived for decades. I knew every inch of my face and hair, but I was shut off from the rest of my body. I overate or ignored my hunger, I slept too long or not enough. I drank too much, sun-burned my skin and stuffed myself into clothes that didn’t feel good. I barely took care of my body, so how could I know it or love it? In return for this neglect, my body gave me pain, aches, skin problems, excess weight, low energy and a host of other issues. If my body was my lover, I would have been dumped years ago.

In the spirit of Valentine’s Day - a day for lovers - I invite you to fall in love with your body again. The thing about love is that the more we give, the more we get back. So start paying attention to your body again. Give it the love it deserves and watch how it gives back. Here are 4 ways get started.

1. Feed your body with love. Choose fresh, whole foods you adore and that look and taste great. Avoid food that makes you feel sluggish and bloated. Want chocolate? Skip the big bag of tasteless foil-covered hearts and go for the highest quality treat you can afford. Feed yourself slowly, treasuring every bite. If you find this challenging, find the pause before eating. Take a deep breath and ask yourself: How will this food feel over time in my body? Choose foods that feel good over time – and notice how they also feel good in the moment!

2. Make a move - and focus on the feeling. There are usually two camps when it comes to exercise. People who love it and people who don’t. People who enjoy moving and exercising focus on the feeling they get after exercise. Ask any exercise lover and they will tell you how amazing they feel after their workout and how they love the results. People who struggle with exercise focus on what exercise costs them. They focus on the time it takes, the money, the laundry, etc. Make a plan to start moving and focus your mindset on how you will feel afterwards. Imagine the joy, the energy and the satisfaction you will have from taking action. Ask yourself, “How will I feel after I workout?” Then go do it!

3. Love the skin you are in. Your skin is the largest organ in your body and it deserves some loving attention. Going from dry cracked skin to luscious softness can be a quick and easy way to shift your mood and energy. Treat yourself to a lovely lotion that smells divine and feels delicious on your skin. Smooth it over your entire body - especially the areas you have ignored in the past. Make it a daily ritual - your skin will love you for it. As an added bonus, tell yourself loving thoughts as you moisturize, affirming what you do love about your body.

4. Get between the sheets. Make a “bed-time” date with your body that allows you seven to eight hours of glorious sleep. Commit to a bed-time and do whatever it takes to honor it. Adopt the belief that “There is nothing more important than my sleep.” Deep sleep allows your body to heal, repair and metabolize. You will be amazed what your body gives back - energy, clarity and joy.

Falling in love can sometimes be scary - especially with a lover we have been ignoring for years. So if “love at first sight” seems too much of a leap, just flirt a little. Go on that first blind date, picking one step from the list above to try today. What have you got to lose?

Erin Postle, M.Ed.

Erin Postle, M.Ed. is a Weight Loss Coach, Psychotherapist and creator of The Weight Loss Toolkit. She is devoted to teaching women how to end emotional eating, and create their ideal body, while living the life they deserve. Through her coaching programs, classes and products, Erin shows her clients how to replace their struggle and pre-occupation with weight with a lot more joy, freedom and abundance. For more information go to www.ErinPostle.com.

The 1.0% Experience

Goal for 2011. Give your husband or wife 1% of your life! (If you have time…)

If on your wedding day someone challenged you to “give a full 1% of your time each week” to each other, to just be together, peacefully sifting through the bits and pieces of your lives; giving space for your love to recover, heal, discover, grow, and to simply really enjoy each other… what might you have said?

“1%? Scheesh… that’s nothing! We’ll be giving alot more than that!”

More precisely, that’s 1 hour & 40 minutes & 48 seconds. Heck. Round it off to 1.5 hours, or 0.89%.

“Sweetheart… can I have 0.89% of your undivided and undistracted time this week? …Please?”

On the face of it, this does not seem an unreasonable request. But how many of us enjoy this real living together as a couple, for this 1% of our week?

One recent survey suggested that 16% of couples manage a weekly date night, but I suspect this is often a movie or some other kind of entertainment not geared toward the quiet interest and seduction I’m suggesting.

In our “Time For Love” post we quoted Jean-Louis Servan-Schreiber who wrote… “Westerners have forgotten the present. Bit by bit they have whittled it down to nothing, and to retrieve it, they must undergo a genuine re-education.”

Let’s think on this for just a moment then…

If you are reading this post in the early part of your day, then ask yourself, what real living am I hoping and planning to fully enjoy today? In the “Time for Love” post we also quoted Blaise Pascal who mused (400 years ago) that most of us spend our energies planning to fully live and to be happy sometime in the (hopefully) not-too-distant future. “It is inevitable” he writes, “that we shall never be happy, as we are always planning on a time which we rarely reach,” …that of really living with each other, in the present.

If you are reading this post toward the end of your day, then perhaps ask, with some reflection, what real living did I fully enjoy today?

Morning? What real living am I hoping and planning to fully enjoy
today?
Evening? What real living did I fully enjoy today?

Pascal suggested that our lives are full of tasks and distractions which stop us getting to the good bits! The day runs out (again) before we get to the living. Even more sobering, our lives may run out as well.

Someone suggested that the main disease of old age is regret. “I just didn’t quite get to the things that I really wanted to do. Perhaps to the loving I really wanted to experience and offer and enjoy.” Cat’s in the Cradle and all that.

We may need help.

I’m going to suggest that nothing breaks into this madness better than sitting idly with your lover, “practicing the presence” of each other. With my clients I urge them to “just show up” in each others lives without much fuss. Think of how easily, happily and perhaps even deliriously we did this in the early moments of our falling in love together. Suddenly it was 3 a.m. Talking, touching, searching, timeless, wonderful, so good. Think about your spouse right now. Is this your experience these days?

I know, the naysayers will cry “life changes!” Kids, work, aging, bills, driving, more work, resentments, and that awful “creeping separateness” which leaves us, perhaps not as enemies, but maybe as foreigners!

Ok then. How about this. 1% of your lives in some sort of dreamy, healing, restoring and enlivening bliss. You can keep on as usual in the other 99%.

I’m going to suggest that this 1% experience will have a striking impact on the other 99% of your life. It can also be addicting. My wife and I started with 1%, but I shamefully confess that recently, this has gotten out of hand, and we are sometimes checking out for up to 2.5% of our lives!

Note: These days this often takes the form of coffee out together. These are not times of intense discussion or problem-solving. No attempt is made to create some sort of deep encounter. We do sometimes play our game, (which usually surprises us in some way or another with happy thoughts that often linger for hours), but for the most part, we commit to put everything else aside, to just be together; quietly, lazily, open.

We are nearly always tempted to shelve the “1% experience” as it seems a bit of a waste of time. We usually grab our 1% fairly early on Saturday mornings, and the temptation to “get things done” when the roads are quiet and the shops mostly empty… is quite strong. But then, at least one of us makes the other stop, and the lazy few hours begin.

So far, we have never been disappointed. Practicing the presence of each other can almost be done in silence, and perhaps sometimes should be. Words are so often used to push each other about as we try to negotiate a better deal for ourselves. (In therapy I often encourage couples to make love, to go for a long walk, and to enjoy an entire meal, all in complete silence. The results can be amazing!)

At the end of my work-week, the last thing I do before leaving is to water the plants (currently five) in my office. It takes me just 2-3 minutes. I do not have degree in botany or plant sciences, and forget how photosynthesis really works, and yet, the plants are thriving and regularly need re-potting. My clients think I’m great with plants! Ha! Amazing.

The “1% Experience” is just the same. Water your relationship for a few minutes each week and it will thrive (as opposed to just “getting along ok”); if you don’t water it, it will die. It really will.

Basic science.

Keep in mind that this “lazily being together” is much easier to agree upon and to look forward to, than a time that we might be setting aside to “deal with issues.” (Ugg!) It should look great in a movie; the couple lingering quietly over a few cups of java, together watching life go by, musing over a few random thoughts and observations, perhaps fondling each other some, and “letting their minds leak” out in bits and pieces.

If this never becomes part of our lives, I know we will regret this deeply.

Suggestion. Nike!

If possible, see if you can agree upon a time that might work for you each week. i.e. – when the kids are in the pool, or at lessons, or a regular drop-off at friends or the grandparents. (Some of my clients have made a deal with friends; you take our kids this Tuesday night, we”ll take yours next week. Friends with friends. We all get our 1%. Win-win across the board; affordable, regular, easy… and legal in most states).

When we meet again each week for our 1% (watering the plant so to speak), we often refer to it as once again “picking up the threads” of our relationship, of the ongoing conversation of this unique and spicy friendship (marriage). Almost any thought will do, and we’re away.

Think about it. When you first fell in love, as you were arranging to meet to be together, you neither worried about what you might talk about, or even if you’d talk much. The being together was the imperative; delicious, necessary, often hot and sometimes timeless. “Look! It’s almost 3:00 a.m. again!” Practicing the presence of each other.

Here’s an easy and revealing possibility for your next time together (join the “1% Experience” club): Begin to talk through these two questions together…

What are the things that fill my life, that for me… just aren’t the really living parts! The tasks, the details, the responsibilities, etc. that keepsurfacing moment by moment throughout my days; the things that never seem to get done?

What are (dreaming a bit) the “really living” things I’d love to enjoy with you WAY more? The things that may have got marginalized, the things that perhaps once filled our relationship and living together, the things I’d like to bring back?

One of the things just might be this… sitting here with you, over a cup of
coffee, smiling thankfully at each other with, “…now where were
we?!”

Pick up the watering can. Go wild!

1%

“Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it!” – Goethe – (1749-1832)

Todd Sellick is a marriage and family therapist in Winnipeg. This post was taken from his blog promoting healthy marriages.



A Fresh Look at Love

We love to capture the beauty of love. In new and fresh ways. You and your man have a unique bond. We'll get to know you and portray the essence of your relationship with images you'll treasure for a very long time.



So something different together than dinner and a movie (or add it in). We offer half-hour sessions for $50 or full sessions for $200 (plus GST).

So call Rodney for a consultation at 221-8413 during the day, Tuesday to Friday. Or go to http://www.evestudios.ca/ and fill out the contact form right now.

When you meet, you'll go over what you're looking for in the session (fun/romantic/clothing ideas/style), see the beautiful album (the matching teeny tiny ones are cute) and wall portrait options available and get to know each other a bit.

Have questions? Call the studio or email (see above). Rodney will be happy to answer them! And remember, it's your relationship and your style.

Speaking of ideas, I ran across this website today: http://www.1001waystoberomantic.com/romantic_tips.htm
We can all be more romantic!

Hope to hear from you soon...

Five Things Every Parent Must Know About Discipline

We’ve all heard that discipline is the “better way” to raise our kids if we want them to grow into positive, loving, contributing members of our society. As a result many of us have tossed the old “punishment focused” tools aside only to find that without those tools our kids don’t listen and we are at a loss for what to do about it. In an effort to fix this problem, we find ourselves putting on blinders to our kids’ bad behaviour, or yelling and threatening – using the exact tools we had promised ourselves we would never resort to.

I believe every parent is doing the best they can with what they know in any moment in time. My goal is to help parents identify what they know and understand why they do what they do, so they can feel good about themselvesas a person and shine as a parent.

Discipline is less about the tool you use and more about the mindset and delivery model than anything else.

The first thing to be aware of when deciding to use discipline, is that what we are really striving for is to instill self-discipline. In other words, we are trying to help our kids internalize a way of living that will guide them in making good decisions in their lives whether we are there to enforce things or not. Done well, it helps our kids become independent and confident in their uniqueness so they can embrace whatever life throws their way and grow to their full potential.
This is not an easy task. Internalizing something is about linking action and consequence in a way that makes you want to do what it right. What is right, can change depending on who you talk to and often doesn’t really connect for us until we have lived it. This means, discipline will not always stop our kids from behaving in ways we do not approve of, but it will open the door to creating a strong loving relationship based on mutual respect and acceptance.

The second thing we need to know about discipline is that it will always be harderfor us to do than punishment. The only way we can truly teach self-discipline is tomodel it ourselves. This means we have to model being calm and self-controlled even when our kids are pushing our buttons or behaving in a way that we think is unacceptable. Being the “bigger person” when things are upsetting to us, is a challenge at the best of times.

Thirdly, because most of us have been raised in an environment that uses punishment, we are familiar with it. This means punishment tools and the delivery model for using punishment is firmly established in our parenting pack. These tools and/or methods will always be within reach when we are parenting, causing us to react in ways we believe unacceptable.

Fourth, it is important to know that when we are in a heightened emotional state
– angry, embarrassed, hurt, scared – we are much more likely to grab for a tool that matches our emotions. Even though we have made the conscious decision to use discipline rather than punishment, and even though we have learned tools and strategies to do this, when our kids are pushing our buttons and we get “upset”, we are very likely to overreact. Sometimes we will grab a tool that we know can be positive – like time-out, privilege removal, etc - and then deliver it in an angry and attacking way.

When this happens our typical response once we are calm, will be feelings of guilt, remorse, disappointment and/or worry that we have ruined our child for life. Mistakes are always an opportunity to grow. So when this happens forgive yourself and use it as an opportunity to model a genuine apology. This doesn’tmean eliminating the consequence that was put in place (providing it wasn’t outrageous) but instead is about identifying how your behaviour did not model the kind of parent you are trying to “grow into”.

Finally, discipline will always work best when we plan in advance. This means becoming aware of our expectations, rules and boundaries and sharing themwith the people we live with. It requires us to come up with ways to deal with problem behaviours in advance and think about how and what these methods willbe teaching. It’s also about thinking ahead so we can be consistent and always follow-through on the rules we have put in place. Although being this organized might sound time-consuming and draining, it actually makes things a lot easier and allows us to model skills we want our kids to internalize.

In the end discipline is a mindset that can help us reconnect with our parenting goals and model behaviours we feel important enough to teach. It is a skill that requires us to really bring out the best in ourselves, before striving to bring out the best in our children. It’s not easy, but it’s worth it – and provides an opportunity for everyone to grow.

Debbie Pokornik is the Chief Empowerment Officer of Empowering NRG. She is the author of the award winning Break Free of Parenting Pressures and believes all parents can use support at some point in their parenting experience. Find out more about Debbie at http://empoweringnrg.com

Sugar Ain't So Sweet

I love sugar, and I used to eat it all the time until very recently. In fact, I’m still struggling with my sugar addiction. Here is some information that might help you with yours.

I used to brag that I could eat a 1lb bag of Twizzlers in one afternoon (and I used to do it often). Even when I was quite slim I seemed to have a genetically fused muffin-top. I thought I was just one of those people who didn't have a long torso. I would never wear low-riding jeans because I'd pop over the sides and it was embarrassing, particularly on someone who was very petite like me. Little did I know that the 5-days-a-week ballet lessons were keeping me slim while the eat-all-sugar-in-sight was fusing the belly fat right to my abdomen.

If I had a sugar craving and there was nothing in the house I would mix butter with icing sugar and cocoa powder to make icing and get my fix. I went through moments of depression, through mornings of waking up with a hangover even though I hadn't had any alcohol. I couldn't understand why I would desperately want to sleep after eating that huge bag of Twizzlers and a coffee! I had mood swings, temper tantrums, crying spells, drowsiness, overwhelming fatigue, difficulty sleeping, would wake up ready for bed, crave sweets all day every day, had headaches that were misdiagnosed as common migraines, and I would stay entire weekends in bed. I had ridiculous anxiety to the point that I didn't want to leave my apartment to walk to the mailbox. I was irritable, I had strange heart palpitations every once in a while. I would forget everything. My eyes were always sore or itchy. I was hungry all the time. Do I sound like a freak yet???

The medical community was no help. One doctor told me that if I was tired in the afternoon, I should nap. Sure, thanks doc. Can you write me a note to give to my boss??

When I became vegan in 2007 I didn't know which candies were ok so for several weeks I didn't eat any refined sugar. I was already eating whole wheat bread and brown rice at that point so it was a great little sugar detox. My muffin top mysteriously shrank a little but I attributed it mostly to the overall weight loss I experienced. But over time, I figured out that I could eat Oreos, Twizzlers, Fuzzy Peaches, Jelly Bellies and many other vegan candies. The old cycle started again.

Now that I am studying nutrition, I am coming across more books than I can keep up with. Something called to me about a book called Sugar Shock. I downloaded a copy to my e-reader and found that I am not alone in experiencing the crazy plethora of random symptoms I listed above. Turns out that I am likely hypoglycemic and that I have become insulin-resistant. I'm well on my way to Type 2 diabetes.

Well you can't have a nutrition coach who's actively giving herself diabetes!!! The more I read the more I realize that sugar is not just the yummy, feel-good benign ingredient that goes into cakes and cookies that you can burn off with a little exercise. The more I read, the more I am learning about sugar's effects not only on diabetes, but also on heart disease, inflammation (linked to cancer, coronary artery disease, Parkinson's, Alzheimer's...) and aging. The more I read, the more I realize that I actually have a sugar addiction much like drug addicts are addicted to drugs.

So, why am I telling you all about my personal struggle with sugar? Well my friends, I
am telling you so that you can do something about it if you have the same problem. I'mtelling you because I'm ticked off that I see skinny minny teenagers with muffin tops in the malls, sipping soda out of giant cups. I'm ticked off that sugar is hiding in so many places like store-bought sauces and condiments. I'm absolutely livid that my favourite flavour on earth, sweet, is so bad for me and will put me into an early grave.

What have I done about it? I've stopped eating a cookie with my coffee at my favourite coffee shop. I'm no longer eating naan with my Indian food. I've made my portions of whole grains, brown rice and whole wheat pasta smaller. I'm now skipping dessert. I'm avoiding chips (fried carbs, anyone??). I'm doing everything I can to reverse the damage that I have done to myself, and I'm going to do everything I can to educate people about the evils of sugar.

You know what? Now I have fewer mood swings. I'm less cranky. I've got way more energy in the afternoon. I wake up feeling well-rested. I don't need to spend all weekend in bed. My sweet cravings are waning. Sure, I've slipped on more than oneoccasion but I am determined not to let it derail me into a fit of eating everything in sight.

The bottom line is that I want you to notice how you feel after you over-indulge insweets or refined carbs. Try cutting them out completely for a week or so. Replace the quick carbs with some additional protein, or with a smaller portion of whole grains. Eat more vegetables. You’ll feel so much better.

Natalie Duhamel is a Winnipeg-based Certified Holistic Health Coach who works with women and men to help them reduce stress, improve nutrition, lose weight, increase energy levels and live their BEST life! www.natalieduhamel.com

Don’t just plan....DO!!!

“Ability is what you’re capable of. Motivation determines what you do” – Coach Lou Holtz

How often have you (or someone else) recognized your potential and realized it’s not being reached?

I have heard the signs of this phenomenon over and over:

“I should/could/would have done that, but...”
“When (insert anything here) happens, I will have more time to do what I want”
“I have a plan I just need to start working on it”

All I hear is “I’M NOT DOING, I’M NOT DOING, I’M NOT DOING” !!!!

There is a major difference between people who are wildly successful, balanced, inspiring and joyful....it’s not that they have more intelligence, more money, more time, more support or more ability! The difference is that people who are successful, inspiring and joyful actually do something about what they want!

This quote sits above my desk where I work from home to remind me not only of my potential, but that it’s my responsibility to actually DO something about it. We often give up control or power by putting our fate/success/desires in the hands of someone or something else.

STOP GIVING UP CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE!!! Your life is yours, no one else is going to live it for you and then hand you the glory at the end! You cannot PVR your life and go through it without the commercials when you’re home from work! You need to take charge, start a plan and (most importantly) start working on any aspect of that plan!

When we begin to be active in choosing how we live our lives, we feel empowered, accomplished, educated, joyful and successful! Even if what you do doesn’t work out as you expected or hoped, you will still feel amazing for having DONE something about it! And when your plans don’t work out as you planned, then you know you NEVER have to try it out that way again!

So get motivated (through coaching, exercise, art, reading, meditation...whatever) and get out there! When you are DOING in your life, your potential will continue to grow!

Aisha Alfa, Alfa Life Coaching

On Senses and Origins

From a post Sonya wrote last year when we did our first art project, "Just As I Am"

I'd been feeling rather flat today: feeling the struggle more than the delight and weighed down by what should be done and what might be rather than living in the moment.

It took my sense of smell to awaken me. I was standing in front of the stove making supper in the early afternoon. Stew to be exact. The tedious work for peeling and chopping was done. I was resigned to the fact that supper would be later than ideal. Just finished browning the meat (and the first batch was partially burned). And then it happened. In went the onion, the carrots, the celery, the garlic...and then the rosemary. Suddenly, the fragrance became overwhelming. Oh, it smelled so amazing! I just couldn't stop inhaling the incredible aroma. And a smile came to my lips, and a lightness to my soul...this was living!

As I washed up the dishes in the soapy water, I reflected on this experience, and was just as suddenly inspired to write about what I heard yesterday in my spiritual community, my church. My pastor (who has been so supportive of us in this process), was talking about the importance of our "origin story". What we believe about where we came from and how we arrived and why we're here affects us profoundly. It affects our purpose, our morality, and (one other thing I just can't remember right now!)

He went on to tell of a few different stories that are out there in the world. One of them was the Enuma Elish, where the purpose of the creation of man was to allow the gods more freedom from work:

When Marduk heard the words of the gods,
His heart prompted him to fashion artful works.
Opening his mouth, he addressed Ea
To impart the plan he had conceived in his heart:
"I will take blood and fashion bone.
I will establish a savage, ‘man’ shall be his name.
truly, savage-man I will create.
He shall be charged with the service of the gods
That they might be at ease!
The ways of the gods I will artfully alter.

So, if we took that to be true, we would have to see ourselves as nothing more than slaves created to do menial labour so that some higher beings would be freer to do what they wanted to without having to deal with "lower things" like taking care of the earth.

And he talked about the Hindu creation story and how different classes of people were taken from different parts of Brahma, the creator god, with the very lowest people taken from the dirt under his feet...and how this affects life in India even to this day.

And then there is the ongoing debate of whether we mutated over time to become the intelligent, creative, expressive people we are today, or whether we were the result of careful design (and there are all sorts of variations and ideas in between).

What we believe about our beginnings is crucial to how we live. I think I will be exploring this further... what about you?