Monday

A little love story

Some of you may wonder how a wife lets her husband do the job that Rodney does. Part of the reason is his character. Part of it is my implicit trust in him and his love.

Wanna hear our love story?!

We both attended the same Bible school in Saskatchewan where we're from. Over the three years, we became good friends. But we dated other people. I actually ended up engaged to someone else and moved to Winnipeg to go to college and be close to him. Rod headed the other direction to Vancouver Island to work with youth.

My relationship was rocky to say the least. I was in it for the wrong reasons (I could write a book on it someday...and hope to!) But I was a nice girl and it took a long time before I broke it off.

Shortly after, we saw each other at a mutual friends' wedding. Instant attraction...but I was there with the other guy. Needless to say, Rod was a little confused, but we worked it out by mail. A month later, he was asking me to visit him on the island (he paid for my ticket with money that he was going to use to buy his first good camera...awww!)

Let me tell you, if you are concerned about not falling in love soon after another relationship, don't go to Vancouver Island! I was a goner. Being with Rod was a complete contrast from the other guy. I felt so accepted, so comfortable, so loved...just the way I was. And he showered me with affection...lots of hugs.

Well, we went on two dates after that: a friend's wedding, and Christmas, and then we got engaged. In Winnipeg, on February 13th. Tons of letters, cards, and phone calls (I was the envy of every girl in college!) fleshed out our courtship. We got married June 15th. And now we're coming up on fifteen years together.

We've had a very interesting journey. Lots of moves and job changes. Winnipeg has become home over the last 11 years though. Through it all, we've been best friends.

What is the secret of our success? Well, there are three things we have tried to make a habit of:
  1. Going to bed at the same time - ensures that we don't "miss each other" on a busy day and we feel more connected at that important close of the day
  2. Sleeping naked - skin-to-skin contact isn't just for promoting attachment between babies and moms...it is a glorious way of feeling close and transparent (and comfortable) and when you have kids, you need all the help you can get to stay intimate
  3. Praying together before bed - these days one of us inevitably falls asleep while the other is praying (it's so soothing!), but what a great way to take your concerns and problems to Someone higher, to hear your spouse's heart, and to ask for help in keeping your marriage strong
And for those of you who are still looking for "the one", or are in a serious relationship, I think a vital ingredient for any long-lasting relationship is absolute acceptance of each other. If you are going into a relationship thinking that you can change or help the other, you're in trouble. If you feel you can't be yourself or are being controlled, you are in trouble. To make a marriage work, you need to see the other as a gift. Through all the ups and downs.

Passion may ebb and flow. Some seasons will be more difficult than others. But when we make the other a priority, when we commit ourselves to the highest good of the other, beautiful things can happen. Even miracles. Someone said something like this (sorry I can't remember the source exactly right now), "Commitment doesn't flow out of passion. Passion flows out of commitment."

Happy Valentine's Day! Thanks for listening to our love story!

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